Time is the most precious gift you can give someone...

Of late these questions rose in my mind...

• Often wondered what would be the most important, precious and nonparallel gift you can give to a person you care?
• How do I know whether the person I think is made for me also think the same for me?
• How you show someone that you really care and love a person?

The answer to all these questions is a single word - TIME !

Yes, if you really want to gift someone something which you feel is unique, gift them your attention, your time, your concentration and your focus. It makes a huge difference when someone pays attention to every word we speak, every feelings of our is cared for, every wish of ours is fulfilled and someone is there for us whenever we need. It makes us feel so special. So if you want to make someone feel special, spend your time with and for them. You shouldn't just do it for the heck of it, as if you lack sincerity, better don't do it, it will have a reverse effect. Also don't eat up the space between you and the person, just express your sincerity and availability. Again, there can be very few people, less than the fingers on your hand for whom this is feasible, else there isn't any sincerity.

If we observe, someone is always making themselves available when we need them, get the idea that the person is attracted to you in one of the three ways - physically, mentally or spiritually. It's the first one for girls in most cases and the other two for boys. However, the mental attraction is very important, because there you connect with an individual. Physical attraction is very temporary and often fade when there is another attractive person around. So don't run after someone if your mind doesn't appeal, since you will feel at a point that there is no use and you have to move on. Sometimes, you go so far you can't return and then you just compromise.

So again, loving someone isn't always enough. Having feelings of love, care and affection is of no use when you don't have time for the person. The amount of time you spend for someone defines how you value that person in your life and hence, gives you a bar to evaluate all the people you know and you can realize whom you care for and whom you don't. It shall help you to realize whom your unconscious mind wants to be with, so you can decide the right person. Often we are confused, as to who is the right person..This can be a good parameter to judge the right person for you.

Wish you good luck !!

Defining relationships...

Often people find themselves in a relationship, which they can't define. They do feel that they are attached to someone, but they can't fit it within the definition of pre-defined relationships. Today's life is so fast and complex, people often find themselves entangled in multiple relationships. With internet opening up new mode of communication, this phenomenon has gone way beyond the expectation of the people.

First of all, one needs to realize the need for the relationship. If we look into the pre-defined relationships of our society, they all have a definite need and neither of them affects the other. So if we find ourselves in a new relationship, it's nothing to be surprised about, but what we really need to figure out is whether this new relationship would affect any of our other pre-defined relationships. If it does, then we must think & reconsider if we are going wrong somewhere in identifying the need to have this new relationship. If it doesn't, then you are fine to have the relationship.

More than often, an undefined relationship hurts some other relationship. The need often generates when people don't get what they expect from their original defined relationships. They end up searching for it outside, out of the boundaries, out of the relationship. That's when it gets into trouble waters. Lot of things are responsible for this, time & care being the first ones to come up on the list, a lots do follow which gain importance.

Someone once said, "if he/she cares for you, he/she will spend time with you". This is very true, since what people don't have these days is time. So if someone is spending time with you, consider that the person is interested in you in some way or the other and hence he/she likes to be with you and share his time with you. However, that isn't enough, since you always look for someone who is caring, loving and sensitive towards your thoughts and feelings. Not everyone fits the bill, and one shouldn't try to force someone to fit the bill just because of some other reasons like physical beauty or moneytary affluence. There is another flip side of it about a person spending time with you, may be he doesn't have anyone else to spend time with. So be aware of that too, because the day he/she finds someone compatible, you won't exist for them. This is the hardest truth and yes reality do bite, almost everyone of us, sometime or the other.

Someone asked me, if it's wrong or right. I believe it's your perception and the perception of the people you care for. So if your heart truly accepts it as right, it is right to you. It is relative, but then again, it shouldn't hurt the sentiments of someone else you care for. As for society, they don't really care, they just need stuff to talk about. Sometimes they talk even when there isn't any relationship per say. They just need feeders for their gossip, so it won't be wise to take decisions based on what will the world say.

Summarizing, it would be easier and comfortable if we try to limit and define our relationship and not let it flow footloose. It would help us to retain our composure as well as justify the need for every relationship we decide to build and retain. It's always wise to build and work for a few relationship and be focussed with it, instead of leaving too many loose threads around. We often do that since we aren't sure which thread would go the distance. The fact we forget is that we need to work on a relationship to make it work, so limit your options, sharpen your focus and work to build a stong and lasting relationship.

Just a saying..

"Never make someone Mandatory in your life,

when you are just an Option for them"

To Make Someone Happy You need to be Happy Yourself

Always thought about this statement and always felt that there can be two views about it, but then only one holds good when debated. So let's see how we can break this statement or strengthen it in its present form. It simply implies that you need to be happy from within, from your heart, to make a person around you happy. It's like an induction effect. You need to have the vibe, to actually transfer it over to a person near you.

Happiness is relative and often varies from person to person with respect to circumstances and situations. People find happiness in different things, different people and different circumstances. So it's very relative and hence can't be generalized. What people end up doing is trying to find happiness in what happy people find not in what they and the people around them would actually be happy with. That's the tragedy...but true.

So try to find out first what makes you happy before you set on a mission to please the world. It isn't that hard, all you need to do is keep your senses open and receptible. You will find what makes you happy and you will make others happy too.

Good Luck in the search...

Does it make sense to give up...

Was talking to an middle-aged friend of mine and felt like the person has given up on life. Felt really bad and tried all possible ways to make the person understand that life is to live not to waste. However it does make me think at times whether a lot of us are like that person. We give up when we get tired of facing life and accept life in its own terms and sacrifice our dreams and eventually stop pursuing them.

I heard from someone a very pessimestic approach to life - Never take life seriously, you will never get out of it alive. I was shocked, but then realised it's true. However, death is the only eternal truth, and it will come in it's due course, why worry about it. I feel we should treat each day as an unit of life. We need to fill our day with everything we can possibly fit in. There should be hard work, relaxation, fun, personal time, everything. So giving up on life is out of question since you have a life everyday. You don't have one life, in fact you have hundreds and hundreds of lives ( in terms of each day of your life) so the statement isn't true. You do get out of your single unit of life, that is a day to face a new day or new life tomorrow. So smile since you have a new day looking onto you tomorrow.

Another challenge people face is society and people around us - our friends, relatives, neighbours, colleagues, everyone. We worry about everyone, but have we ever thought, how many actually think well of us or do something to make us happy. If you have such people you should care about them and consult them about the decisions you make in life, otherwise, the rest, they aren't worth it. You should live first for yourself and once you are happy with your life extend that happiness to others. You can't make anyone happy if you aren't happy yourself. Isn't it logical that you need to have something before you can give it to someone. So first make yourself happy and then make others happy. However, don't make others unhappy in the process of making yourself happy. If that is so, then you are going wrong somewhere, choose an alternative. No one needs to get hurt if you become happy, you can't help if someone gets jealous or hates you, they are unhappy even before they met you, so don't worry about them.

In a nutshell, however old you are, whereever you are, whatever situation you are in, NEVER give up on life. Once you stop making an effort to live life that is improve your life, you are basically carrying your caracass. No Point. So fasten your belts, tie your shoe laces, stand up and take charge of your life. You can do it, you have to believe you can do it. It's never too late. I actually came across an uncle who married at 42 with a 37 year old lady, they met in a bus and travelled together everyday to work and one fine day, the bus broke down and they walked, had dinner, sat in a park and finally ended up getting married.

So life is there, you need to look out for it, it should be somewhere, waiting for you round the corner, DO NOT GIVE UP....just live it with a smile and be open to accept changes in your life. Life does give you options and choices, you just need to choose the one that suits you the best !

Good Luck !!!

Why is it so difficult to "Let Go..."

This question has always come across my mind that why people find it so difficult to let go. This isn't restricted to people's personal life but also in professional life. People become comfortable with some people or some situation or some position and then find it extremely difficult to let go if they have to for whatever reasons. They cling on to it, at least try the same until the leash becomes narrower and narrower and breaks, leaving behing bitterness. It's like holding sand in your hand and trying to grab it hard, it just slips out leaving your hand with traces of it, most of which is gone long. So why the desperation?

Human nature is such that, it loves to be comfortable. We don't want to face challenges once we become comfortable. We do everything to reach that comfortable situation, but once we are there, we just don't feel like facing any more challenges. Until then we struggle, we fall, we rise, we break our backs and minds to pursue our dream or that comfortable situation. However, the moment we get it, we become kind of laid back and lazy. We don't really focus on the fact that nothing in life is permanant and sooner or later things will change. So if we don't change with time, we will be outdated, left behind and life will move on. An old saying says, time and tide waits for none, so it won't wait for sure. It will just roll on and we need to keep pace with it. We don't need to run all the time, but then the pit stops should be as per what we need, not more than they actually should be.

In a professional world, when a person has to delegate a lot of control or in other words, let go control over important things, they feel uncomfortable and try to cling onto it. What they overloook is the fact that they get more sophisticated controls in terms of people to whom they are delegating the control. So it's wise to let go. Even nature teaches us the same. Look at a snake, it periodically, sheds it skin and gets a fresh and shining new one. Every time a sheep is reduced to nothing after the wool is shaved off, it gets new wool. So it's wise to just let go and look forward to new things in life. What's the point in living a life where you things outgrow you. You always should outgrow things and people around you. If it happens otherwise, it's time to let go, that's how you know it's time for you to let go.

Even on the personal front, we are in a relationship where we aren't getting what we expect and we still cling onto it. Not everyone, but most of us don't even try to sit back and analyze why things are going wrong, what's causing so much problems. Do we analyze if we are mandatory in someone's life or just an option for them. Personal situations are mostly unique and varies from person to person and also situation to situation. So it's difficult to generalize it. However one thing works in most cases.

Let the person know about your real feelings, don't fake it. If you do that, you harm yourself as well as the person both. Nothing comes out of it and both suffer. So it's wise to be honest about your relationships. Secondly, let the person go and give the person space. If he/she cares about you, she would want you in the space, else just kiss good bye and move on with your life. The tough question arises as to how long you should wait. It's not that hard if you are honest to yourself. You know the person and also know how much time the person approximately take to make a decision. Giver him/her a benefit of doubt and wait a little more, even if you see the person is pursuing other fishes. He/she might just want to see how it feels to be with somebody else in comparison to you. It might work eitherway, but forcing the person to not to do the same doesn't help. It only increases distance between them and you and they will anyway do it, you can't watch him/her for 24 hours. You need to trust them and just let them decide what they want out of life. Once they decide it's you, things are fine, else just move on with life, there is a life ahead of you and there would be others who might appreciate your love, care and time.

Yes, all these are easier said than done, and it hurts to let go...but then it's for the better that you let go, since there is a saying that says, Don't run after what you want, always look for what you deserve.

Dreams vs Desire & Expectations...

Have been thinking about this for a while now, and decided to gather my thoughts and type it out as my today's take on how we deal with life. There are a few things which often left me wondering as to how to deal with them. Dream, Desires and Expectations are those which often left me thinking as to where and how a dream become a desire and/or expectation.

If we retrospect our own lives, we would find that in most cases we suffer because somehow our dreams became our desire and hence it hurts when it isn't fulfilled. We start expecting certain things and certain behaviour from a person or situation which if doesn't happen to our liking we get hurt. We often become un-reasonable and become crazy about that fact that we desire something and we can't exist without it. In the process, we get hurt since more than often it's a desire which we have built up within ourself, not considering the circumstances well.

This doesn't mean we should not dream or have desires. We should have. The key is to define our expectations and set our desires at an appropriate level and be honest to ourself and to the situation when we do the same. There is no point building castles in air or by sea side, they don't stay for long and it hurts when they are gone. It's fun to play on the sand, but not in real life. So watch out when you desire and always remember what you deserve. So the balance between what you desire and what you deserve is very important to keep you away from pain of unfulfilled desires and expectations.

It's not easy to be rational when it comes to limit your desires and expectations. You should never stop dreaming, but just make sure that you don't turn your dreams into desires without really considering the fact that it is only your desire, not what you deserve. If you deserve, there is no harm in it, since it would be yours, sooner or later.

Dream, have your eyes on the sky and feet on the ground !

Fighting depression...

Often when we are disturbed and depressed due to situations in life or due to some people whom we care for. Under those circumstances, we try to find a friendly shoulder where we can get support. However, we often forget or ignore the strength of our inner self. There is temendous strength in our own mind. If we don't used it, it will loose it's strength and we will always become a parasite and look for support outside and never care to find out what really lies within ourself.

Over the years, everyone of us have gone through ups and downs and we always feel that we alone are the most suffered being on this planet. However, we don't realize that we have seen a limited part of the world and there is loads more in life that we see or come across. There are people who suffer more. I am not talking about those who are deprived of food, house and clothes. I am talking about those who have everything in their life, still suffer a lot due to various reasons. Some suffer more than we do, so your pain is the most until you come across someone who is in more pain than you are.

The tough question is how do we actually address it. Every person has their own way of addressing it. So you need to find your way of supporting yourself. Different people use different ways to handle stress and depression, here are some of the common ways people think help them a lot.

Some people love to just connect with nature, go for a trek, or for a wildlife tour, or a walk barefoot on the beach, or a shower in a waterfall to re-connect with themselves. We should never leave the connection we have with our mind and always try to keep that connection alive and kicking.

Some others I know empty their wallets, as shopping helps them to gain some confidence, but then you can do this only if you can afford. You can look yourself into the mirror and feel good about yourself in those new stuff. It helps but then it's temporary, how long can you really shop.

Even came across some who go wild and party crazily and try to drive out the thoughts of their tensions in the loud music and busy chats of their friends. This also helps but then often you end up feeling lonely in a crowd, there can't be a worse feeling than that. Then they try to get intoxicated and try to be in trance so that they avoid reality.

All these measures and there are many others, don't work out since it only eclipses the problem, don't solve it. The first most important thing is to accept the problem and understand it, we often don't do it properly. Once that is done, we should confront it and try to work out a solution not be aggresive and spoil the situation. Work out and propose solutions instead of re-iterating the problems and complaining, which take you no where. Always find a way to address the problem. There is always another way, you just need to find it.

If nothing works and you have run out of options, go back to your source, you are sure to find solace their. The best is your mom, just go and be with her, sleep in her lap and eat through her hands and be with her. If you are unfortunate to have lost her, and you don't have anyone who is a motherly figure to you. Go back to the place you were born, go back to the place where you have spent your best days of your life, go back to the place where you have lived a life, go back to where you grew up. Meet some old friends, spend time with them and rejunivate your senses and your mind in the process. This should work, if it doesn't, see a spiritual person who can teach you to meditate and guide your mind, not everyone, but someone with loads of experience and spiritual knowledge.

However, I would still recommend to dig out your strength from your inner self...

The art of Decision Making...

Yesterday, while chatting up with a friend of mine regarding some issues, we ended up in a debate about the art of decision making itself. Interestingly enough, we shared varied and entirely opposite but valid arguements in favor of each. We were actually discussing a problem and ended up debating about this issue.

According to my friend, we should take decisions based on our instinct, gut feel. We should take decisions quick, since the more delay in making a decision, the situation becomes more complex and it's become difficult to make an unbiased decision. According to him, a problem is like quicksand, the more you struggle, the more deeper you get into. You need to take a decision and figure out a way to come out, instead of struggling. The focus should always be to reduce the constraints and restrictions in the order of their magnitude. Sometimes, they are inter-related, and reducing some might cause auto removal of some others. It might bring about a new situation, but then you need to trust your gut and take calls fast.

Of course, there is a big possiblity that you might go wrong, but then there is never something called a perfect decision. If you ever feel that you have the perfect decision, then you are doomed, you are making a mistake for sure. So just make your call and then see how it works out, it might either get solved, or pose some new problems which can also be dealt with.

The other way to look at this is to make decisions with patience and after evaluating the problem for various angles and actually considering the various factors that the solution involves to solve the problem. This is little slow in nature, but what it also brings is a high probability of being closer to the appropriate decision. This is because during the considerations and evaluations, one shall think ahead and tried to imagine, prototype or consider the strength of the solution under the challenging circumstances, posed by the problem. This approach includes doing a balance sheet of the pros & cons related to each solution of the problem we are trying to solve. You need not know accounts as a Chartered Accountant for doing this, so just try to write out on two sides of a paper and then compare, you understand things better and consider them better, when you actually put them on paper.

To summarize, both the approaches are valid and the best way to adopt the art of decision making one should have both these arrows in their arsenal. Depending on the situation, they need to decide which arrow or approach to be used in that particular situation. It isn't advised to use only one approach all the time, since time and tide changes and so we should change the way we approach and deal with situations, people and yes, problems.

Doing things in politically right way or otherwise...

Often we come across a challenge in life - how to do things or take decisions. Whenver, we have to decide or act in a manner and we do the same in two distinct ways - one is politically right and the other being what we really want to do. Not everyone is good at this diplomacy, but then we do have traits of diplomacy in ourselves, which we have it either in-born or we acquire over our life through experiences.

Today's world is complex and given the fact that every 9 out of 10 person is self-centered, self-obsessed and hence can do anything to protect self-interests. This wasn't the case when we were young and in school and even in college. Once we stepped out in the coroporate world, we do need to build our own shield around ourself to prevent ourselves from getting exploited, used and discarded. In the process, we build up an invisible wall around itself and hence derive the self based qualities, even if we didn't have the same in the first place. We somehow forget our natural innocent self which we had in our academic life. We kind of put up masks and try to enact as per the situation we are in. We try to be someone who is successful and look forward to immitate him and in the process, loose the inherent qualities with which we were born. So we start acting and doing things politically correct, so that we stay in the league. We kind of hesitate to do things the way we really want, since it would make us stand outside the league, which is normally more challenging and demanding.

The patience level has gone down among us, thanks to the traffic, corruption and pollution around us. We need success and we need it fast. This is something which is affecting the society. We don't hesitate to take decisions which pleases others - not only in professional life, but in personal lives as well. We plan little or don't plan at all, thanks to the lack of patience. We just want to live a life the way it comes and have heard many speaking in this language. In our relationships, we focus on immediate results and we don't do forward thinking. We want returns for our time and energy this moment, so we do things that are politically correct, instead of doing things our heart says. If we do the later, we shall have more permanant, relishing and beautiful results for our effort than in former.

What this tendency has done in us is to make us restless and constantly desire for what we don't have and ignoring what we have. This is the particularly harmful part and in the process of being politically correct and being acceptable in the society, we loose our individuality and end up being a part of the crowd. However, there are some of us, who do things with heart and not for the sake of being politically right. We should encourage people to do the same, since it would build up a more social environment and break the personal self walls people build around themselves. It would make everyone concerned happy and fun to live !

However, said that, we do come across some situations where handling things is better in diplomatic way and acting or doing things in a politically correct manner is preferable and desirable. In such situations we do have the suppress our heart and act in a politically correct way to ensure that things go smooth. We need to however ensure that we don't hurn anyone in the process, then it can't be justified. So the balance is entirely with respect to the person and with respect to the situation.

Let's use our brains for our professional life, and our hearts for our personal life. This is tough, but the best way to lead your life. Let's do things with our heart and the way we want not just for the sake of being politically right, thought some tricky situations needed to be handle with diplomacy, but the onus of using the same depends on us.

Let's decide wisely.

Every Problem has a Solution in its womb...

Looking at the life I had so far and also the people & situations around me, I figured out that there is always a potential solution in the problem itself. If we come across a problem, it disturbs us so much that we forget to see the possible solution, the problem brings in itself. The sad part is the solution isn't visible for long and gets lost as the problem occur.

When you see people solving problems with ease, more than their knowledge and skill, it's their reflex to spot the potential solution when the problem occurs. Sometimes, it's not the solution, but a clue that leads you to the actual solution. So it might be strange, but it's true.

The other aspect I learnt when I was in school. I was always in a hurry to solve problems and often made mistakes in simple ones, not because I didn't knew how to solve them, but just because I didn't study the problem well. Along the years I have realized how true those words were and feel it was one of the most important lessons of life my teacher gave me.

We need to understand the problem well. This is the second core policy when it comes to solving a problem. Often we realize that we have understood the problem but we haven't since we tried to solve it even before we understand it. Often when a problem occurs, we get a little disturbed, that's the biggest challenge. To stay calm and maintain composure when a problem occurs. If we can do it, we can view the problem in a different light and would thereby help us to understand it better. We should track the problem well and then try to solve it taking a cue out of the problem itself.

Instead of solving the problem the way you believe, always be open for alternative solutions. The goal is to solve the problem, not solve it with the solution you like. The solution we like may not be the appropriate one or the best one, but since it satisfies our wish we kind of want to think it's the best one. So there lies the mistake and we need to grow beyond that. Only then we can really succeed in solving problems efficiently and closer to perfection.

To summarize, solutions of a problem lies where the problem is. It always gives out the solution or at least a clue to the solution. Look out for it and solve your problems better.

Good Luck !

Sacrifice & Compromise - Needed for a relationship?

This is something, I have been thinking for a while, so decided to write about it. I know it's a tricky subject to discuss this given the fact that there is multiple facets to it. So I would try to analyse may be only a couple of them.

When you get into a relationship, one of the primary aspects of it is to understand the person you are having a relationship with. Often people make the mistake of putting across their point and not listen to what the other person has got to say. In today's world, people have a mindset, what's there for me, what ways do I benefit and so on. There are very very few expceptions where people are in a relationship and they do think beyond their own interests.

So what is needed to build up successful relationships. If we look beyond the smiles and happiness of being in sucessful relationship, we might be surprised to wonder the toughness of the sacrifices and compromises the persons must have done. So let's anaylze whey we do sacrifice or why do we compromise. If you think well through, you will realize that there isn't any relationship where people haven't sacrified. It's a way of life, let's face it. We need to work for a relationship, not just let it work for you. Well the sucess lies in the fact that how well we make our relationship works for us.

One other thing is trust which is the main pillar for a relationship. Sacrifice & Compromise makes up the walls for the same. So we need to strengthen the trust we have in a relationship. We need to sacrifice our ego and be modest. We need to live with the limitations in a relationship we are building or sharing. However, we should never loose our self respect at any cost.

Drawing a line...

Often we wonder is enough truly enough. When do we draw the line, when do we actually sit up and take a decision. Most of us have this issue, every now and then, and more we grow in life, it shall be defined by how good you chose to draw a line.

In laymans' term, that is in simple english, drawing a line means taking a decision that the limit has been reached or breached. The interesting part is however lies post the drawing of the line. Humans generally draw line based on instincts, based on other goals and sometimes just because that is the only thing they can do. They don't really justify why they are doing it, as in why they are drawing the line, not even to themselves.

Relationships sometimes surfaces with all many things and people in it, kind of become indecisive as to what to let go and what not to. To predict and act on when and where is the right time for the line to be drawn, is practically impossible, it can be by sheer luck and/or coincidence. Hence, we should also land up ourselves somewher close by as close as possible to the perfect one.

Now the funny part starts, once the line is drawn. People become lineant and want to withdraw the line or push the line thereby becoming accomodative. It's nice to be thus, but if you open up to be accomodative all the time, you loose your position, you line and your respect. So judge wisely as to when you actually draw the line. It's good to be 'little' flexible, that's doesn't hurt too much.

A line can be as simple as a line on paper or even the dangerous LOC. So watch out when you draw the line, becauses consequences are bound to surface.

Is there something called right decision?

I always wonder if any decision can be termed as right decision. I somehow feel that you really can't make a right decision. You can just pick the best decision from a bunch of possible options. You just try to be as close to Right as you possibly can. However, there are various angles to the same point, so it isn't wise to believe that something is the right decision, there is always a better way to do the right thing.

People always say that they don't have a choice. I always believe that you always have multiple choices for any problem. What we don't see as a solution is a result of our incapability to accept the reality, fear to test the unknown, instinct to fall in line and do things the world does and not step out of the line and take the hard road and do it differently. Sometimes I do agree that we can't pick choices because we are always having other responsibilites ranging from family to financial, from professional to legal. However, decisions that change your life, we need to focus on the fact that, sometimes the harder way is the better way.

Being right is all of us want always, but we are humans, we do make mistakes and sometimes it changes things and people around us. We don't make the right decision, but then as I said, there is nothing called the right decision, it's just one of the many possible decisions we could have made. So it's important to look at the all the possiblities before making a decision.

So the important thing is to pick the best possible right decision and if in case we realize it's not right one, re-think, re-evaluate and make ammends as soon as possible. There is no point in being adamant and intensify the damage our wrong decisions make.

So when you make a decision that is very important for your life, do the following:

1) Take 2 pieces of paper and a Pen (NOT on Computer). You can use many post-its, 2 coloured ones are the best.

2) Write down the Pros & Cons in each piece of paper or if you are using post-its, each should contain a pros and cons. Think well, be crisp and to the point.

3) Now in a separate page or post-it, write what your goal is, what you are trying to achieve by making the decision. Try to identify your goal properly, since it will give the clue to your decision.

If you have done the 3 steps properly, the rest is little routine work.

Now you need to cut the points on both pros and cons which affects you least untill you have 2-3 on either side. Now focus on the goal, read it and then read the pros and cons, try to eliminate slowly. If required, take a break, come back fresh. The best time to do this early morning, once you are awake, had your breakfast. At this point, your brain cells work at their optimal capacity.

This may not be the best way to take decisions, but it works ! Worked for me !

The life of a Drop of Water...

When I was in school, I had read a poem by a famous poet. That poem made a huge impression in my life and till date I haven't forgotten it. I was thinking about that poem and the feelings behind it.

When a drop of water has to leave the cosy lap of the clouds and travel towards the earth, it is always in a dilemma as to whether it should leave at all. It is worried where it shall land up. It can land up in the dust and get lost. It can land in fire and get burnt. It can land in a lake and get lost in the millions of other drops. So it keeps wondering about it's destiny, but does leave the clouds.

Once it travelled a long long way, a wind blew it away towards the sea. There was a oyster open with it's shell facing the clouds. The dropped reached there and became a pearl !!!

We often are skeptical about stepping out of the comfort of our house, our relationship, our jobs, our existing life. We don't like changes much, because we need to make effort to adopt to those changes. However, if we continue feeling like that, we shall end up being a frog in a well and loose the challenges, success and failures that lies beneath it. Most of us are happy to lead a very laid out life and don't like to step out and face the change.

I watched a movie, where an actor cracked a moral joke and said that unless you try, make an effort and step out of your comfort, you would lead the life of a looser. Once you step out, you might fall, many times, but if you stand tall, that's a success well earned, well deserved. So go out and face the challenge. It's worth it.

Thumbs Up !

It's time to move on?

This question is so very difficult to answer but I decided to think about it and resume writing with an attempt to find an answer.

I came across this question and it took me a while to decide whether I should move on or just try to refresh the situation. I felt let me consider both the options and then decide what works out.

Someone once told me, if a glass object breaks, don't try to gather the broken pieces, it will hurt your fingers. Just broom them off !! I know it's easier said than done, when it comes to real life and I feel it's true to the last letter. So you might want to gather the larger pieces to start with, that is solve the larger problems. If they get solved, then go for the smaller ones. The tragedy however is that the smaller ones hurts more. So unless you pick the bigger ones, don't go for the smaller ones. If nothing works, yes, broom them off !!!

Moving on in life is very important. The only thing in life that is consistent is CHANGE. So change it, change your life, change your way of thinking and move on. I believe, when you try to move on and there is a change in your life & your lifestyle, then the person involved was very dear to you. If you move on and nothing much changes for you, then the person wasn't really that important. That's what my experience says.

Most often people are scared to move on. They feel that they will be alone and that insecurity stops them. Remember the time when you walked alone and this person came along. So if you see the life ahead is lonely, don't get bothered, since once you start working and you are deserving, someone will walk along holding your hand. Make sure you make yourself desirable. There are lot of people in the world who appreciates sincerity above anything else. So just go ahead and yes - 'keep walking' :)

I felt like mentioning a little about dreams and expectations. Consider your dreams as your goals and expectations, keep them to the minimum. The tough part is the ignorance to realize those dreams, so be worried to search that, don't search the goal, search the path to reach there. Don't expect a lot from people, the less you expect, the less pain you are likely to get.

So if you feel there is enough reasons to try, do that before you decide to move on.

Good Luck !